Certain twist in events had things come to a certain point -- where it goes downhill.
It's sad. Very sad, in fact.
It also made me realize how love gave someone the power to break you.
I don't know, if I were to tell a story of a downhill -- it's complicated. Less drama.
Try, keep trying? (For me, it's tried, TRY some more?)
Was I wrong to love in the first place? (A part of me never wanna be right again)
Probably the person, which I didn't actually choose, but having that sorta connection between us was unexplainable. We felt connected.
They say, timing is everything.
Monday, November 14, 2011
Friday, September 30, 2011
Nobody's Fool
Oh gawd. I'm back! =)
It's been almost 6 months since I last blogged.
Heh. Don't know if I'd go on blogging, knowing life is hectic as it is -- the interest in blogging just falls apart.
Nothing much changed, still at the same job, still loveless, tinge of cluelessness.
Inevitably, timing is everything. We all grow up.
Oh wells, just to catch up for lost time -- I'm starting off by browsing around other blogs.
[prolly leave a note here, there]
It's been almost 6 months since I last blogged.
Heh. Don't know if I'd go on blogging, knowing life is hectic as it is -- the interest in blogging just falls apart.
Nothing much changed, still at the same job, still loveless, tinge of cluelessness.
Inevitably, timing is everything. We all grow up.
Oh wells, just to catch up for lost time -- I'm starting off by browsing around other blogs.
[prolly leave a note here, there]
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Ponder Pondering Thoughts
Strange hour to be typing something out but anyway...
Ever felt something swimming in your thoughts, one can't quite comprehend? Trying to comprehend but still confused? :)
Oh wells someone i met tonight sorta gave me this whole annoying feeling, nothing bad for sure. Probably sort this out in the morning.
Then again, it's probably the small talks nobody would remember after they get home.
C'est étrange...
Ever felt something swimming in your thoughts, one can't quite comprehend? Trying to comprehend but still confused? :)
Oh wells someone i met tonight sorta gave me this whole annoying feeling, nothing bad for sure. Probably sort this out in the morning.
Then again, it's probably the small talks nobody would remember after they get home.
C'est étrange...
Monday, February 28, 2011
Checkin In
Hello peeps.
The place is left so so alone. Workload is piling up to the brim leaving me with late nights, weekend work and whatnots. So I was busy, but it was no excuse. Anybody who gives the - i'm busy excuse should be grilled! :P Cause no matter how busy you are, no time, whatever should learn to make time. I believe if there's a will, there's a way.
Obviously, I didn't have the will to blog. I was lazy, procrastinating but doing some other stuff.
So, Saturday night was the nightout for the first time to Marketplace.
Yeah. I've always heard of it, know where it is but never been there. Here's to a first.
Clubbing nights at Marketplace is on Saturdays.
(Afterall, only agreed to go at the invitation of a good friend)
So I arrived the place a total stranger, found couple of men at the upper level gawking whilst queuing to get in. Adjourned inside to find the place filled with... ooh. hot men. :)
Dance floor was just small, but had good rounds of cardio though it got kinda stuffy after awhile. Headed upstairs to chill by the couch with friends. And more hot men around.
Seen quite a few familiar faces tho... from say Grindr, Bloggers. So it seems everybody knows everybody, including their histories. Hmm. Small world. Well, had good fun and only left at 3 am and headed for food with friends.
Now, perhaps that's worth a second visit. Hopefully there's better music and crowd.
Anyone been here? What's your say about Marketplace.
That was my weekend. After weeding out the boring ones :P
How was your weekend?
The place is left so so alone. Workload is piling up to the brim leaving me with late nights, weekend work and whatnots. So I was busy, but it was no excuse. Anybody who gives the - i'm busy excuse should be grilled! :P Cause no matter how busy you are, no time, whatever should learn to make time. I believe if there's a will, there's a way.
Obviously, I didn't have the will to blog. I was lazy, procrastinating but doing some other stuff.
So, Saturday night was the nightout for the first time to Marketplace.
Yeah. I've always heard of it, know where it is but never been there. Here's to a first.
Clubbing nights at Marketplace is on Saturdays.
(Afterall, only agreed to go at the invitation of a good friend)
So I arrived the place a total stranger, found couple of men at the upper level gawking whilst queuing to get in. Adjourned inside to find the place filled with... ooh. hot men. :)
Dance floor was just small, but had good rounds of cardio though it got kinda stuffy after awhile. Headed upstairs to chill by the couch with friends. And more hot men around.
Seen quite a few familiar faces tho... from say Grindr, Bloggers. So it seems everybody knows everybody, including their histories. Hmm. Small world. Well, had good fun and only left at 3 am and headed for food with friends.
Now, perhaps that's worth a second visit. Hopefully there's better music and crowd.
Anyone been here? What's your say about Marketplace.
That was my weekend. After weeding out the boring ones :P
How was your weekend?
Monday, February 14, 2011
V Day
Aw shucks! I've not been blogging for the past week or so. Feels like a month.
Lazy bone kicking in. Been back at work for the longest time or it seems, after Chinese New Year. This year's was somewhat ordinary, including the usual table gambling with cousins and touch base with the cousins and relatives.
Quite a shocker to find out some cousins of mine are actually gay, *surprised look*
one was grindr-ing in the hallway; where everyone was. ha!
Oh wells. Had a rough patch over the holidays, needed time to pick myself up. It gets better though. No matter how superficial-look-a-like it was, I was affected emotionally. One of those rare occasions somehow, since maturity does comes with age that allows us to eventually grow above all this.
Thinking over a split second, i really felt, this is the one. I had to tell him, that I like you. I just know if I don't say it, I'll spend the rest of my life wondering. He shared the same sentiments, but only barriers exists. After all's said and done, i held his hand closely but he had to leave the country. I was really sad.
He hopes to see me soon. So do I. (but we all know, only time would tell)
But I believe, everything happens for a reason.
Next topic, the Prospect.
Lazy bone kicking in. Been back at work for the longest time or it seems, after Chinese New Year. This year's was somewhat ordinary, including the usual table gambling with cousins and touch base with the cousins and relatives.
Quite a shocker to find out some cousins of mine are actually gay, *surprised look*
one was grindr-ing in the hallway; where everyone was. ha!
Oh wells. Had a rough patch over the holidays, needed time to pick myself up. It gets better though. No matter how superficial-look-a-like it was, I was affected emotionally. One of those rare occasions somehow, since maturity does comes with age that allows us to eventually grow above all this.
Thinking over a split second, i really felt, this is the one. I had to tell him, that I like you. I just know if I don't say it, I'll spend the rest of my life wondering. He shared the same sentiments, but only barriers exists. After all's said and done, i held his hand closely but he had to leave the country. I was really sad.
He hopes to see me soon. So do I. (but we all know, only time would tell)
But I believe, everything happens for a reason.
Happy Valentines everyone.
It's just a day, like any other. But well wishes to all couples and single people like myself here.
Next topic, the Prospect.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Back
Random thoughts.
Without you, today's emotions would be but the remnants of yesterday's.
"Sans toi, les émotions d'aujourd hui ne seraient que la peau morte des émotions d'autrefois"
Without you, today's emotions would be but the remnants of yesterday's.
Friday, January 21, 2011
Unwell
Unwell . Lately.
For the past week, the very least - yours truly was lost in his own world, probably a delusional one. Time flies like a duckling flapping its wings. It's close to month end and here's to more holidays!
i'm taking meds now since i'mma sick boy. Down with fever, flu and cough... sigh
will update soon.
Don't we all need a hero?
For the past week, the very least - yours truly was lost in his own world, probably a delusional one. Time flies like a duckling flapping its wings. It's close to month end and here's to more holidays!
i'm taking meds now since i'mma sick boy. Down with fever, flu and cough... sigh
will update soon.
Don't we all need a hero?
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Away and Back
the lack of updates.
Was rewarding myself with additional days of leave! Haha. But I'm gonna be back to work tomorrow. I spent the past weekend - down under, Singapore meeting up with fellow friends and some catching up after the New Year. Some have started new jobs, some stuck with whatever they're doing (eg. me) And the usual rants of life.
The problem with expectations is that you're bound for disappointment. Not a rare phrase now, would you disagree. Wouldn't you already know the outcome, or foresee it coming yet you still go ahead doing what that puts you in a disadvantage? Rings a bell?
Right, right. No one is to be blamed...? *rolleyes*
The Ex. Although I don't want to have to do with anything with him. Maybe, just maybe, a small tiny part of my heart still misses him. Seeing each other off and on went well as just friends. Recent times, I got a Whatsapp message from him, not understanding (himself) why everytime he sees me, he keeps falling in love with me.
It strucked me. Superficial. I thought. I didn't reply. Then again, it made all the difference.
Of bad habits. Grindr.
It depends on the individual what do they use it for. Spot cuties, some looking for fun and whatnots. Bad habit is that I grind a tad bit too often. It drains the battery :P
I rarely initiate a conversation unless I was pretty interested. All I got was fun requests. Stamp ok or deny? LOL.
Anyone using this iP app. Why do u use Grindr for?
Counting down to the weekend anyone? :)
Was rewarding myself with additional days of leave! Haha. But I'm gonna be back to work tomorrow. I spent the past weekend - down under, Singapore meeting up with fellow friends and some catching up after the New Year. Some have started new jobs, some stuck with whatever they're doing (eg. me) And the usual rants of life.
The problem with expectations is that you're bound for disappointment. Not a rare phrase now, would you disagree. Wouldn't you already know the outcome, or foresee it coming yet you still go ahead doing what that puts you in a disadvantage? Rings a bell?
Right, right. No one is to be blamed...? *rolleyes*
The Ex. Although I don't want to have to do with anything with him. Maybe, just maybe, a small tiny part of my heart still misses him. Seeing each other off and on went well as just friends. Recent times, I got a Whatsapp message from him, not understanding (himself) why everytime he sees me, he keeps falling in love with me.
It strucked me. Superficial. I thought. I didn't reply. Then again, it made all the difference.
Of bad habits. Grindr.
It depends on the individual what do they use it for. Spot cuties, some looking for fun and whatnots. Bad habit is that I grind a tad bit too often. It drains the battery :P
I rarely initiate a conversation unless I was pretty interested. All I got was fun requests. Stamp ok or deny? LOL.
Anyone using this iP app. Why do u use Grindr for?
Counting down to the weekend anyone? :)
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Why
Sometimes I wonder why I even try.
So, you see, how now?!
I think too much for my own good. Typical ponderer. Since the possibilities seem endless and there's about a dozen outcome to this. Unrelated.
I had a good busy start of the work day. Got myself a new formal shirt to start off Day 1 of 2011 :) Barely had time to myself today with several stuffs and questions to be answered, typical workday. Mundane so to speak.
Didn't hit the gym today cuz I got off work later than usual. The day ended just like that. And the same cycle continues tomorrow! Gah. Now, where's life? I don't seem to have one =P
Sunday, January 2, 2011
The New Year, 2011
Woke up this afternoon thinking to myself.
Hmm. the New Year.
Heck, seems like any other day... :P
Okay. Let's rewind to New Year's Eve. To be honest, the day passed really quick. Felt particularly lazy not to mention what a rude awakening since it's a holiday. I had to meet a couple of people, settle some errands. What happened was, I've recently started scouting for a place to live in Damansara so had arranged to meet the Agent to showcase several units, all of which were pretty okay-decent. But looking at the rate things are going, nothing's really certain just yet but a lengthy process plus couple of concerns to iron out. Sigh.
I headed back after the few errands and lunch with family. Slept off my whole afternoon. Worked late the day before since we're a day short to clear up the backlogs of trades and postings that I hadn't reviewed yet.
I was unnecessarily keeping myself really busy. I'm exhausted.
By all means, it's still work that has to be done since it has a deadline. Little did I know, I was keeping busy just so that I wouldn't think of him. Distracting myself, if anyone would've put it in a perspective. There's little I could do, really. He is someone I see as an opportunity like Future Value, and a Present Value to be figured. Without a given formulae, one has to derive the FV and PV. All in all, I was certain he was being unnecessarily difficult, walls built to withstand calamities of love. Only time would tell and I had to respect that afterall?
I've travelled this road before. How familiar. Trivial matters like this I've used to letting it be or let the cards fall where they may. Problem with me is allowing it to slip away. But like I've once heard - Relationships are only for the those who are prepared, not those wanting it.
Countdown to the New Year. Had adjourned to the Curve with a group of friends; rather the most happening spot for an event like this. their Fireworks display never fails to amaze me and way better compared to 1Utama.
01.01.2011
Since we're livin' in the New Year, I told myself this year is gonna be better than the last. Let the past not repeat itself but as lesson for us to live the future :)
For the rest of ya'll, how was your New Years?
Hmm. the New Year.
Heck, seems like any other day... :P
Okay. Let's rewind to New Year's Eve. To be honest, the day passed really quick. Felt particularly lazy not to mention what a rude awakening since it's a holiday. I had to meet a couple of people, settle some errands. What happened was, I've recently started scouting for a place to live in Damansara so had arranged to meet the Agent to showcase several units, all of which were pretty okay-decent. But looking at the rate things are going, nothing's really certain just yet but a lengthy process plus couple of concerns to iron out. Sigh.
I headed back after the few errands and lunch with family. Slept off my whole afternoon. Worked late the day before since we're a day short to clear up the backlogs of trades and postings that I hadn't reviewed yet.
I was unnecessarily keeping myself really busy. I'm exhausted.
By all means, it's still work that has to be done since it has a deadline. Little did I know, I was keeping busy just so that I wouldn't think of him. Distracting myself, if anyone would've put it in a perspective. There's little I could do, really. He is someone I see as an opportunity like Future Value, and a Present Value to be figured. Without a given formulae, one has to derive the FV and PV. All in all, I was certain he was being unnecessarily difficult, walls built to withstand calamities of love. Only time would tell and I had to respect that afterall?
I've travelled this road before. How familiar. Trivial matters like this I've used to letting it be or let the cards fall where they may. Problem with me is allowing it to slip away. But like I've once heard - Relationships are only for the those who are prepared, not those wanting it.
Countdown to the New Year. Had adjourned to the Curve with a group of friends; rather the most happening spot for an event like this. their Fireworks display never fails to amaze me and way better compared to 1Utama.
01.01.2011
Since we're livin' in the New Year, I told myself this year is gonna be better than the last. Let the past not repeat itself but as lesson for us to live the future :)
For the rest of ya'll, how was your New Years?
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